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Oboe pooped in my eye yesterday morning. I was lying on my side in bed and he was perched on my temple. And then suddenly my eye was warm and wet. As gross as it was, I was relieved that it was the lovebird and not the Amazon who had pooped in my eye.

Actually, both birds rarely poop on me. Oboe might poop on my legs, but almost never on my head or shoulders. I think he got confused because I was lying down. In the four months Kazoo has been living here, he has only pooped on me once, while sitting on my shoulder. Even then, he tried to aim it away from me.

Having poop in my eye reminded me of something that happened many years ago. I was 17 and hitchhiking around Nova Scotia, and I found myself standing outside a shopping mall chatting with a busker. While we were talking, a seagull pooped on my head. It was a large seagull, and a large slimy poop. I went into the mall to use the washroom to clean myself up. But there was a mentally ill woman in the washroom and she started talking to me. She told me in detail about all the operations she’d ever had. She even took off her clothes to show me the scars. And I stood there, for HOURS, listening politely and looking at her scars, not knowing how to extricate myself. Meanwhile, other women came and went, and the seagull poop congealed in my hair, and still this woman went on and on about her operations and how the doctors had inserted microphones and transmitters under her skin to intercept her thoughts and steal her ideas. I was such a polite kid. It never even occurred to me to just leave.

In other news, we’ve decided on a name for the baby African Grey parrot.

Drum roll, please.


Simon Taylor Grey.

I can’t wait for him to get here. I think about him all the time.

GC and I went to The Running Stitch, the quilt shop in Kanata yesterday. We both impulsively signed up for an introductory quilting course, which starts on March 24th.

I woke up yesterday morning with a bit of a cough. By evening I had a fever of 38.5. GC asked how I felt otherwise, and I told him I was fine. Then I stood up and realized I wasn’t fine after all. I was dizzy. Every muscle and joint in my body suddenly ached like crazy.

It was a rough night. Fever, chills, headache, intense aches and pains. Around dawn GC got me some ASA and a big glass of water, which helped a lot. The fever broke, and the aches and pains diminished. Now I just have a cough and I’m weak, but in that nice curl-up-on-the-couch way.

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